Random Chit running around my brain.

Today we will be touring my brain. Please keep your arms and legs inside the car, do not feed any of the weird things we run across and please, please do not litter. There is enough shit in there and no further garbage is needed.

Our first stop will be here, where I am trying to figure out if that fish in the Captain D's commercial is some sort of serial killer. He is in fact forcibly feeding other fish to people. Really, beating the hell out of people and putting a plate full of fish in front of them. Would he be a mass murderer or a serial killer? What he is doing can't be right in the fish world.

Speaking of mass murder sites, if CSI came in my house would they be able to tell that the blood currently all over the kitchen floor is because the dog is in heat (yes, again I missed getting her fixed.)? Or would they haul my ass to jail and then figure it out?

Why is it that in every CSI episode, they use flashlights instead of just turning on the lights? I nearly scream at the TV, "Turn the damn lights on!" Can they see better with a flashlight? And if they must use a flashlight, why not use one of those huge lights instead of that little pen light?

Though not really related to this, but going on in the same area......

Since when has a shooting not been considered a murder investigation from the start? I was watching TV and I heard a news preview. This was their exact words....." A shooting in a small town has lead to a murder investigation. Get the latest tonight at 6." WTF. Someone gets shot and they have to think about it before deciding to investigate. I always thought a shooting was murder until proven an accident. I could see, maybe a shooting during a hunting trip, but this person was found in their home!

On to our next section, you never know what you might find.

That puppy is on crack! I don't know where she found it, but good Lord, where the hell does she get so much energy? She was on the cable for all of 15 minutes. But she runs from one end of the house to the other and jumps on every bed in between and the couch too. And gets in my face to give me love, why? She jumps, licks and runs. Wash, rinse and repeat.

Daisy really is smart. She got "Not Yours!" from day one. She has figured out that people are under the covers and if she wants to lick skin, she must go under the covers. And that when Little Miss covers her head in the morning, in an effort to avoid getting woke up, that she didn't disappear, she just has to go under the covers to get to her. She has also learned that white thing in the kitchen, when it is opened, food comes out! And when the black thing beeps, warm food! And if a person goes into the kitchen, there is a chance they might drop food and if she is quick enough, she will get it. And that silver thing that gets hot, burns the hell out of your nose if you stick it to the rack! But it may be worth it if a little grease gets dripped in the floor!

Now if we could just teach her the difference between Little Miss knocking on the wall and someone knocking on the door. Every time Little Miss knocks on her bedroom wall to get our attention, Daisy runs to the door waiting for you to open it. She doesn't bark, she just sits there and looks at you like you are an idiot for not answering the door. If she only knew!!!!

I have decided to call leftovers, Reruns! When they ask whats for dinner and I say the dreaded phrase, what ever is in the fridge, warmed up, you would think, I just told them we were eating the dogs! But they will watch reruns on TV until they know it word for word! So no more leftovers, we will be having reruns instead.

My, a good idea! Let's see what is going on over there, please watch run step......

How they hell can they sell trucks for half price? If they can sell them for half off because gas prices have gone up, can't they sell them that cheap all the time? I understand, gas has gone up, people are buying smaller, more gas efficient cars. They have to have a way to get them to buy the trucks. But why buy a truck for the same price as a car and still have to pay damn near $4. a gallon for gas? Do advertisers not think? Or do they think we are stupid? 15 thousand bucks to buy a car that gets 30 miles to the gallon or 15 thousand to buy a truck that gets 20 miles to the gallon, hum...... But the truck is half off!!!!! I think I will buy the gas guzzling truck! Does it make sense to anyone else?

On to the other side of the gray matter........

Why the hell can my husband take up 2/3 of the bed for 20 years, but I take up a little over half the bed for the last few months and suddenly we need to rethink our sleeping arrangements!?! Since my back has been bothering me, I can't sleep straight on my hip and I can't sleep on my stomach, so I put a pillow under my chest and stomach to lean on and I take up a little more room. Now all of the sudden, it's not right to not share the bed equally. I get it, he is 6'2, 218 and I am 5'0, 100 plus pounds, he needs more room, but shouldn't I get a little bed too. And now the puppy is sleeping in there too, I get like an inch of bed. I could sleep on my back, but NO!!! He claims I snore on my back. He claims that I have even woke the puppy up when I get on my back. He snores every way he lays. But I guess he is a man and it is OK!!!!

And back over here, is a memory of the time my SIL's washer flooded part of her house......Past the whole incident, past the whole crying and why my house stuff. We are now up to when she asked me to be there when the insurance guy comes so she doesn't get screwed over and to ask questions of him........

This man thinks we are idiots! I am not an idiot! Yes sheet rock is made wet, but it will crumble if it gets wet again. No, it will not just dry and go back to the way it was. It will bubble out and crack up. If it was OK for sheet rock to get wet, they wouldn't store it inside!!!! It wouldn't be taking up precious indoor space it would be out there on the wood yard! No carpet shouldn't stand in water! Not so bad on the carpet, but the wood under it, not so good for it! Why yes, you can dry the carpet, pad and even the wood, but the wood will still buck up in the future. And it could even cause a soft spot in the floor. Why yes, Mr Insurance Adjuster, I do seem to know a few things. What is that you say? I am misinformed!!! Well, I guess we can call my dad and have him come over and put in his 2 cents worth. What? You have other appointments? You must leave now and you will call my SIL in a few days? Well, SIL, you are screwed! And in the end she was. They dried up the carpet and such and had her cabinets touched up just a little. Now the carpet is coming out in clumps and the linoleum has shrunk and she has a gap between the carpet and linoleum and there is nothing she can do about it.

Why do men think women are stupid? That we can't be somewhat informed? I have been reading a lot about how PR people are treating SAHMs like trash or idiots. *sniffle, sniffle.* (I don't have PR people contacting me. Note to self..... Get a group of followers, get PR people to contact you, start a new blog just for making money. *sniffle sniffle* OK.) Just because we can stay at home with our kids, don't mean we are idiots! Some of the stupidest people I know have jobs outside of the home!

It's not SAHMs or women who are stupid it is, in fact, men! Not only do they not give women credit for their intelligence but they can't take a hint. What part of the words..... We have the house all to ourselves, the kids are gone for the night....... Means PARTY! Grab the beer and come on in! Next time I think I will just say, "Could you give us a minute or two? I would like to rip my husband's clothes off, throw him on the ground and have my way with him! Shouldn't take us too long. I will send him out when I am done with him!" Would they wait or would they run screaming out of the yard? And how long would it take my husband to recover from the shock of me saying it? Would I ever get to take advantage of him?

One last area, it is a little cramped over here, if you could just stand closer together. I don't know if it is a lot of thoughts or just a very little space. * I haven't watched The Cosby Show in years.* Please watch out for the flying random thoughts. They mean no harm, they just don't pay attention. *Oh, its the one where Sondra has the twins.* Another passing thought, I did mention for you to pay attention.

When the hell did the US get Super Delegates? What are they? Some sort of super hero who swoops in and saves us from ourselves? I have never heard of them before. Have they always been there and never needed? Who chose them? I don't remember anyone asking me if I wanted to do it. I don't remember anyone asking me who I wanted to do it. What makes them so special that they can decide who they want to be the candidate? And would Obama be so gung ho about how they should vote for the one who gets the most popular vote, if he was running behind in the popular vote? I want to be a Super Delegate, I hear they can be bought! I need money, I too could go for the highest bidder. Take money from both and then vote for who I want to! heh! I mean what the hell could they do? Complain? I gave her thousands of dollars to vote for me! And she went the other way! Paying someone, isn't that bribery? And isn't that a crime? I guess it is not bribery, its a donation to a worthy cause. Can I be the worthy cause? I should run for president, I think I could turn everything around.

I see another post in the making. I hope you enjoyed the tour. Thank you for spending time here listening to the random toughts that take up space in my brain. Tomorrow, we may hear the thoughts on a presidential run, perhaps a few thoughts for a running mate and cabinet choices. Until next visit.....

HAVE A GREAT DAY AND THANKS FOR VISITING!!!!!!!